01. Fake Tales Of San Francisco

Fake tales of San Francisco
Echo through the room
More point to a wedding disco
Without a bride or groom

There’s a super cool band yeah
With their trilbys and their glasses of white wine
And all the weekend rockstars in the toilets
Practicing their lines

I don’t want to hear you
(Kick me out, kick me out)
I don’t want to hear, you know
(Kick me out, kick me out)
I don’t want to hear you
(Kick me out, kick me out)
I don’t want to hear you
I don’t want to hear your…

Fake tales of San Francisco
Echo through the air
And there’s a few bored faces at the back
All wishing they weren’t there

And as the microphone squeaks
A young girl’s telephone beeps
Yeah she’s dashing for the exit
And she’s running to the streets outside
Oh you’ve saved me, she screams down the line
The band were fucking wank
And I’m not having a nice time

I don’t want to hear you
(Kick me out, kick me out)
I don’t want to hear, you know
(Kick me out, kick me out)

Yeah but his bird thinks it’s amazing, though
So all that’s left
Is the proof that love’s not only blind but deaf

He talks of San Francisco, he’s from Hunter’s Bar
I don’t quite know the distance
But I’m sure that’s far
Yeah I’m sure that’s pretty far

And yeah, I’d love to tell you all my problem
You’re not from New York City, you’re from Rotherham
So get off the bandwagon, and put down the handbook
Yeah, yeah, yeah

Get off the bandwagon and put down the handbook
Get off the bandwagon and put down the handbook
Get off the bandwagon and put down the handbook
Get off the bandwagon and put down the handbook
Yeah

02. From The Ritz To The Rubble

Last night these two bouncers
And one of em’s alright
The other one’s the scary one
His way or no way, totalatarian

He’s got no time for you
Looking or breathing
How he don’t want you to

So step out the queue
He makes examples of you
And there’s nowt you can say
Behind they go through to the bit where you pay
And you realise then that it’s finally the time
To walk back past ten thousand eyes in the line

And you can swap jumpers and make another move
Instilled in your brain you’ve got something to prove
To all the smirking faces and the boys in black
Why can’t they be pleasant?
Why can’t they have a laugh?

He’s got his hand in your chest
He wants to give you a duff
Well secrectly I think they want it all to kick off
They want, arms flying everywhere and
Bottles aswell it’s just
Something to talk about
A story to tell you

Well I’m so glad they turned us all away we’ll put it down to fate
I said a thousand million things that I could never say this morning
Got too deep, but how deep is too deep?
This town’s a different town today
Said this town’s a different town to what it was last night
You couldn’t have done that on a Sunday

That girl’s a different girl today
Said that girl’s a different girl to her you kissed last night
You couldn’t have done that on a Sunday

Of course not!

Well I’m so glad they turned us all away we’ll put it down to fate
I thought a thousand million things that I could never think this morning
Got too deep, but how deep is too deep?
Last night what we talked about
It made so much sense
But now the haze has ascended
It don’t make no sense anymore